From the secret files of Dr. Seuss

(Note: this little poem was in response to a perverted dr. seuss thread on Collarchat.com)

I would make you beg and bawl
and I’d make you kneel and crawl.
I would tie you up with hemp
’till you’re quivering and damp.

I would call you filthy things,
whip you with a cat that stings,
spank you ’till you start to fly,
then keep going while you soar high.

In a plane, in a train, with your box (you sexy fox),
in a hall, in the mall, in your bush (or your tush),
from behind, from in front, with a sigh, with a grunt,
while i’m pulling on your hair, while I whip your derriere,
breathing heavy in your ear (is it getting warm in here?)

Make you say “You wouldn’t dare!”
Then prove I would, haha, so there!

clamps, cuffs, and a gagging ball,
vibes and dildoes (big and small),
blindfolded against the wall,
paddle, flogger, try them all!

Raise in you a little fear
then make you clean up all the gear
Rub your skin, brush your hair
good sub earned her after care

Confidence

On the one hand it’s good to not be 100% confident about something, because it encourages one to learn more about that something.

On the other hand, sometimes it’s nice to be all “Oh yeah, I got that shit down.  You gonna suffer now, girl.  Suffer…and love it.”

Finding a good Dom

You’re spending more and more time with your dom(me) and it’s all so magical you feel like you’re in love and because you’re in love the dom(me) seems so very very perfect… but you look at all the things in your life you feel need work and you feel unworthy in a way words will never fully describe.

See, here’s the thing: Let’s say, purely for the sake of argument, that you are not worthy.  Is crying going to help?  No.  There are things you can change in your life to feel worthy.  Work on those things until they are the way you wish they were.

The closer you get the better you will feel and the more that attitude of winning will radiate into the universe and attract the one you desire.  Best of all, it’s a snowball effect: the closer you get the harder you work, the closer you get.

Let’s also consider if you are worthy.  Well then that means you’re upset for nothing.  Silly emotions, will they ever get anything right?

At the end of the day I don’t believe you can find real, healthy love & respect unless you also love & respect yourself.

So my order to you is thus: take one thing in your life you wish was better and make it better.  It could be making your bed every morning.  It could be flossing more often.  It could be getting those sexy six pack abs or taking that night school class.  Start small.  Pick something you couldn’t possibly fail to achieve.  Then see how it makes you feel.  Better, yes?  Just a little?  I thought so.  Now try the next thing.  Keep going.

Build that snowball.

Keys

Avoid losing your keys like I did tonight. Put the phone number of a trusted friend on your keychain. That way if you lose it, your friend can retrieve the keys for you. Don’t put your own phone number on the keys. Any fool with internet can look up your address from your number and then empty your house a week later while you’re back at work.

Sweet flying spaghetti monster I was so very pissed at myself tonight. First time ever that I lose keys. If I’m really lucky the bus company has them. If I’m really lucky *and* really stupid they’re still in my office. Let’s all hope I’m that dumb.

Lesson learned, donate to the war amps.  They’ll take care of it and it’s a good cause.

(I found my keys on monday.  They were in my office door.)